Meanwhile, Saul was still breathing out murderous threats against the Lord’s disciples. He went to the high priest and asked him for letters to the synagogues in Damascus, so that if he found any there who belonged to the Way, whether men or women, he might take them as prisoners to Jerusalem. As he neared Damascus on his journey, suddenly a light from heaven flashed around him. He fell to the ground and heard a voice say to him, ‘Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?’

‘Who are you, Lord?’ Saul asked.

‘I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting,’ he replied. ‘Now get up and go into the city, and you will be told what you must do.’

The men traveling with Saul stood there speechless; they heard the sound but did not see anyone. Saul got up from the ground, but when he opened his eyes he could see nothing. So they led him by the hand into Damascus. For three days he was blind, and did not eat or drink anything.

Acts 9:1-9

Are we imprisoned by certainty & anger? Are we set and determined down a path of destruction, thinking others will get hurt when the resentment is only killing us? Are you being called to let all that shit go?

Saul had all his armor: his achievements, his purpose, his status, his community, his resume on paper. God needed to blind him, to set his eyes on something new. God needed to make him helpless and dependent in order for him to starve out the toxins that were in his body. What will it take for you to let go of your armor, detox and drop whatever is making you tense and tight?

What is your anger covering up? Where do you feel injustice? How would you like the world to be? Why? Who would benefit if you got this world? Would it make you more vulnerable and empathetic? If you got this world, would it bring people together or tear communities apart? I hope that under our righteous anger is a compassion for humanity and a hope that renewal is possible & coming. I pray that you can let the anger point to the compassionate fragile beautiful heart inside that God wants to use, and actually, can only use. Be caring. Be fragile. Let go of that armor.