CBG: Goodness

May 25, 2020 — Leave a comment

And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. And God saw that the light was good.

And God said, “Let the waters under the heavens be gathered together into one place, and let the dry land appear.” And it was so. God called the dry land Earth, and the waters that were gathered together he called Seas. And God saw that it was good.

The earth brought forth vegetation, plants, yielding seed according to their own kinds, and trees bearing fruit in which is their seed, each according to its kind. And God saw that it was good.

And God made the two great lights — the greater light to rule the day and the lesser light to rule the night — and the stars. And God set them in the expanse of the heavens to give light on the earth, to rule over the day and over the night, and to separate the light from the darkness. And God saw it was good.

So God created the great sea creatures and every living creature that moves, with which waters swarm, according to their kinds, and every winged bird according to its kind. And God saw that it was good.

And God made the beasts of the earth according to their kinds and the livestock according to their kinds, and everything that creeps on the ground according to its kind. And God saw that it was good.

And God saw everything that he had made, and behold, it was very good.

Genesis 1:3, 9-10, 12, 16-17, 21, 25, 31

A satisfaction where there used to be a lack. A fulfillment where there used to be a need. A fullness where there used to be emptiness. A way of life that makes sense where there used to be stagnancy. Purposes accomplished where there used to be nothingness to strive towards. A right way of being that aligns with the heart of God where there used to be a white canvas of possibility.

Goodness leaves us in awe of what is and what can be. Goodness shows us the possibility of humanity working together and for each other. Goodness humbles us to look up and say, wow. Goodness warms hearts, souls and bellies that were hungry. Goodness closes the distance between relationships. Goodness creates the unexpected that was the exact thing that fits. Goodness demonstrates the wholeness and communion of God.

Prayer: God help us see the wonders and beauties around us. God help us see ourselves as part of the wonders and beauty of your handiwork. God make us creators of wonder and beauty in our relationships, our words and our work.

Character: In what ways have I neglected the good that is me, that is others, that is the world?

Grace: How does your body and mind respond when you are satisfied?

CBG: Reflection

May 24, 2020 — 1 Comment

For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it. Therefore lift your drooping hands and strengthen your weak knees, and make straight paths for your feet, so that what is lame may not be put out of joint but rather healed. Strive for peace with everyone, and for holiness without which no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one fails to obtain the grace of God; that no root of bitterness springs up and causes trouble, and by it many become defiled.

Hebrews 12:11-15

It’s difficult to lift your hands when you are tired. It’s hard to keep walking when your knees have already buckled a few times. It’s arduous to keep on the path when everything in the moment feels out of line. Yet it’s in the small acts of defiance towards our hopelessness and doubt that we experience our power and strength. It isn’t easy, but the alternative is worst. The moping, the complaining, the self-doubt, the defeat will sink deep and plant roots that will take even more work to pull out later. So today, this moment I ask and pray that you and I will look towards peace rather than protecting our ego. I hope that we can focus our hearts to open and give. I pray that we become fearless in the furnace of character and faith building. We are being trained for battle.

  1. What has your self-doubt been saying this week?
  2. What activities and people lead you towards complaining?
  3. How have you defied hopelessness?
  4. Who is cheering you on?

CBG: Kindness

May 23, 2020 — Leave a comment

And David said, “Is there still anyone left of the house of Saul, that I may show him kindness for Jonathan’s sake?” Now there was a servant of the house of Saul whose name was Ziba, and they called him to David. And the king said to him, “Are you Ziba?” And he said, “I am your servant.” And the king said, “Is there not still someone of the house of Saul, that I may show the kindness of God to him?” Ziba said to the king, “There is still a son of Jonathan; he is crippled in his feet.” The king said to him, “Where is he?” And Ziba said to the king, “He is in the house of Machir the son of Ammiel, at Lo-debar.” Then King David sent and brought him from the house of Machir the son of Ammiel, at Lo-debar. And Mephibosheth the son of Jonathan, son of Saul, came to David and fell on his face and paid homage. And David said, “Mephibosheth!” And he answered, “Behold, I am your servant.” And David to him, “Do not fear, for I will show you kindness for the sake of your father Jonathan, and I will restore to you all the land of Saul your father, and you shall eat at my table always.” And he paid homage and said, “What is your servant, that you should show regard for a dead dog such as I?” Then the king called Ziba, Saul’s servant, and said to him, “All that belonged to Saul and to all his house I have given to your master’s grandson. And you and your sons and your servants shall till the land for him and shall bring in the produce, that your master’s grandson may have bread to eat. But Mephibosheth your master’s grandson shall always eat at my table.” Now Ziba had fifteen sons and twenty servants. Then Ziba said to the king, “According to all that my lord the king commands his servant, so will your servant do.” So Mephibosheth ate at David’s table, like one of the king’s sons.

2 Samuel 9:1-11

Maybe you’ve never said, What is your servant, that you should show regard for such a dead dog as I?, however, I hope you have had moments of unexpected generosity and attention. In those moments, you see how you expected to be treated versus how you are treated. There is no me versus you; it’s us.

Kindness requires sacrifice on one end and surrender on the other, neither easier than the other. Kindness requires eyes meeting. Kindness is close and intimate. It says, you are welcomed to come in. Kindness feels like the only right way for the people involved even if it often feels absurd to anyone observing. Kindness doesn’t add up even though it’s the only way to wholeness. Kindness is humanity connecting on the deepest level to meet each other’s needs.

Prayer: God make me someone who sees others and cares well even when my mind fights it.

Character: Where have you sacrificed hospitality?

Grace: What acts of generosity and attention have you experienced recently?

CBG: Patience

May 22, 2020 — Leave a comment

The words of Nehemiah the son of Hacaliah. Now it happened in the month of Chislev, in the twentieth year, as I was in Susa the citadel, that Hanani, one of my brothers, came with certain men from Judah. And I asked them concerning the Jews who escaped, who had survived the exile, and concerning Jerusalem. And they said to me, “The remnant there in the province who had survived the exile is in great trouble and shame. The wall of Jerusalem is broken down, and its gates are destroyed by fire.” As soon as I heard these words I sat down and wept and mourned for days, and I continued fasting and praying before the God of heaven…O Lord let your ear be attentive to the prayer of your servant, and to the prayer of your servants who delight to fear your name, and give success to your servant today, and grant him mercy in the sight of this man.” Now I was the cupbearer to the king. In the month of Nisan, in the twentieth year of King Artaxerxes, when was was before him, I took up the wine and gave it to the king. Now I had not been sad in his presence. And the king said to me, “Why is your face sad, seeing you are not sick?” This is nothing but sadness of the heart.” Then I was much very much afraid. I said to the king, “Let the king live forever! Why should not my face by sad when the city, the place of my fathers’ graves, lies in ruins and its gates have been destroyed by fire?” Then the king said to me, “What are you requesting?”

Nehemiah 1:1-4, 11-2:4

Between the report Nehemiah received in Chislev (November/December) and his request to the king in Nisan (March/April) is 4 months. During that waiting period, Nehemiah, wept, mourned, prayed, fasted and also attended to his duties. As soon as the King asked him what he wanted, Nehemiah laid out his plans. And the king granted him what he asked.

Patience isn’t sedentary. It’s not doing nothing in hopes that something will spring out of zero. Patience is simmering and preparing one’s heart for the right moment to take action. Patience is acting from a place of preparedness. Patience requires faith that we do not dictate diving timing, whereas we live under its reign. Patience is trusting that there is a script beyond our mini scenes and the few characters we get to interact with; that if we allow it, we will see a whole greater narrative unfold without us getting in the way of it. Patience is choosing the collective long-term good over one’s immediate comforts and desires. Patience is the inhale of a situation and an exhale of how I am feeling, before another inhale of how are they feeling and an exhale of what do we need here. Soon, the breaths will ease their way into action. Do we have the faith to make space for the breaths?

Prayer: God help me to breathe before speaking, breathe before judging, breathe before acting. God help me to trust your divine timing and help me to let go of my plans that come from fear or a need to control. God help me to honor what is currently on my plate while stilling holding close the desires of my heart.

Character: Where am I holding my breath because I want to hold control?

Grace: Where have former prayers and dreams transition into actualizations?

CBG: Peace

May 21, 2020 — Leave a comment

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.
Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way, though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains tremble at its swelling.
There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God, the holy habitation of the Most High.
God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved; God will help her when morning dawns.
The nations rage, the kingdoms totter; he utters his voice, the earth melts.
The Lord of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress.
Come, behold the works of the Lord, how he has brought desolation on the earth.
He makes wars cease to the end of the earth; he breaks the bow and shatters the spear; he burns the chariots with fire.
Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!
The Lord of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress.

Psalm 46

What do you hold onto when the foundations you’ve set your feet on fall away? Your security and your safety net, if you were ever lucky enough to have one, show themselves to not be stable after all. Where do you look when all you’ve worked towards is thrown into emptiness? Your achievements and your diligence are unprepared for new obstacles. When you thought you had done enough and gotten on top of your circumstances, exhaustion creeps in. How will you make it to the morning?

Peace is the anchoring into what hasn’t been been shaken and what hasn’t been defeated. Peace is making room for God’s presence when everything around you is telling you to close up shop and protect. Peace is looking at everything coming at you while focusing on the fortress of your character and God that exist in between. Peace is hearing the noise and shouts yet recalibrating the breath to a 4 count inhale, 4 count exhale. Peace is seeing all that seems against us with compassion. Peace is silent during the good times and loud during the hard times. Peace is a practice of presence. Peace is a muscle of response rather than one of reaction. Peace is a choice to surrender control.

Prayer: God I pray that you will reveal where I am placing my trust. Teach me how to breathe in a manner that quiets me and those in my presence. Teach me to pause before reacting out of anger or hurt. Teach me to see attacks and attackers with compassion.

Character: Where am I choosing to fight by ignoring the bigger scene and narrative?

Grace: How can I make room for moments of presence today?

CBG: Joy

May 20, 2020 — Leave a comment

And [Jesus] sat down opposite the treasury and watched the people putting money into the offering box. Many rich people put in large sums. And a poor widow came and put in two small copper coins, which make a penny. And he called his disciples to him and said to them, “Truly, I say to you, this poor widow has put in more than all those who are contributing to the offering box. For they all contributed out of their abundance, but she out of her poverty has put in everything she had, all she had to live on.”

Mark 12:41-44

I find deep joy in this poor widow. She is poor and is acquainted with deep loss, yet gives everything she has, everything she has to live on, on God. If Jesus were not there, the disciples might not have known her circumstances and even judged her meager offerings.

Joy isn’t neglecting nor wearing our circumstances on our sleeves. Some may know what we’re going through and others might not, yet still the same we act. Joy isn’t necessarily showy and can be seen in our small acts. Joy isn’t necessarily for others and can be seen witnessed by others. Joy builds up our own integrity and courage. Joy requires faith. It requires being present in the moment while not being bogged down by the present situation.

Joy is quiet and full. Joy is found in the small moments of difficult decisions. Joy is a trust that things will work out. Joy is seeing beyond what you can presently see. Joy is the ambient hum of love and wholeness through all situations. Joy looks differently on everyone, but when you are in the presence of genuine joy, it quiets your own anxious stirrings so you can hear the faint melody of hope always playing throughout.

Prayer: God I pray for joy that helps be let go and surrender. God I pray for joy that expands all that I already have. God I pray for joy that centers and expands my capacity to love.

Character: Where is your focus on poverty and loss?

Grace: Who has shown you tremendous joy recently? How did it make you feel?

CBG: Love

May 19, 2020 — Leave a comment

For this is the message that we have heard from the beginning, that we should love one another. We should not be like Cain, who was of the evil one and murdered his brother. And why did he murder him? Because his own deeds were evil and his brother’s righteous. Do not be surprised, brothers, that the world hates you. We know that we have passed out of death into life because we love the brothers. Whoever does not love abides in death. Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him. By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers. But if anyone has the world’s goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God’s love abide in him? Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.

1 John 3:11-18

What is love? Baby don’t hurt me…We all know the concept of love. It’s in songs and in cards. We tack it on to our goodbye’s. Even those who have never read the Bible can recite the first bits of 1 Corinthians 13, love is patient, love is kind…

Love is so simple, yet impossible to fully define in a succinct tagline. We can describe its traits — patient, kind, does not envy, does not boast — yet like God, is too big for us to grasp. That’s the beauty of it; it envelopes us and not the other way around.

With Cain and Abel, we see what love is not. Cain killed his brother because he was too self-involved with his own deeds and could not bear to share the spotlight with his brother. He wanted to be congratulated. He was entitled. He felt threatened when his brother got the attention he thought only he deserved. This state of being — entitled self-involvement that makes one feel protective and who’s self-worth is contingent on others — is death. This attitude acts from a place of lack and a need for approval.

It can be trite to say love is simply the opposite. These fruits of the Spirit, the first listed being love, are beyond binary thinking. They are the opposite, and some. So what is love: it takes into account others. It comes from a place of security. It is not threatened by the success of others. It is not contingent on a response. It is not protective. It does not have an end like death. Love is a whole-hearted honoring and empowering of another fueled by the faith that another’s good is your own good. Loving your brother is trusting that their well-being is vital to your own well-being. Love yourself is trusting that your own well-being is vital to the well-being of all. Love begets love. It draws humanity closer while expanding our view of who & what is of humanity.

By the power of Christ’s utter display of sacrificial love, we, too, can love in this radical open give-it-all way. It’s not that Christ neglected his own well-being; he simply focused solely, on ours instead. That takes tremendous faith and power.

Prayer: God I pray that you would break my need to be protective. God I pray that you would keep growing and building my sense of worth and out of that, I can love others without need. God I pray for the power and faith to shift my focus onto others when I’m feeling entitled, too self-involved and needy.

Character: Who is hard to love? Where is it hard to love? When is it hard to love?

Grace: When have I felt love that made me let go more?

CBG: The Flesh

May 18, 2020 — Leave a comment

I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these, I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control, against such things there is no law. And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.

Galatians 5:16-24

At first blush, I am angered by this passage. It pits flesh against Spirit. It feels like it’s telling me not to trust my body and my gut, which I already disagree with. It lists things such as fits of anger and sensuality, two things I do not think are bad in itself, in ominous light. I hate the fear it enlists by dangling the kingdom of God has something you can lose. I hate the binary thinking painted in this passage. Can this passage really be telling me that I have to ignore and disregard my body and its desires? I don’t think this passage is saying disregard the body. Jesus literally came to earth to redeem and to glorify the body. Jesus himself showed us the power of God in the flesh. Jesus shows the embodiment of being led by the Spirit while in a body. You can’t be led by the Spirit without the flesh.

Was there a moment when the “desires of the flesh” were not aligned with the Spirit in Jesus? Jesus always acted with such certainly and rarely double-thought his actions. The only time he came close was at the Garden of Gethsemane. Jesus voiced a bodily desire and then did not gratify that desire for the sake of God. What made that desire of the flesh wrong?

It’s not because that desire of the flesh is selfish. He didn’t want to suffer torture and death; that rarely makes a person selfish. I think the bodily desire was “wrong” because it went against Jesus’ integrity and purpose. Gratifying that desire of the flesh would be living out of fear, instead of out of love. There is nothing wrong with fear itself; it’s responding from that place that is problematic. Gratifying the desire of the flesh lives in the realm of living out of fear and living misaligned from our integrity. Coming full circle, it is out body that often knows before our mind, when we are acting out of fear and acting without integrity. Trusting the gut is acting from a place of integrity. For those of us in Christ, who believe in the work of the Holy Spirit, our integrity is constantly being illuminated and strengthened by God.

Now the works of the flesh are evident…are led by fear and lacks integrity. Sure, there are things on Paul’s list that have these traits, and so do many actions not listed. How often have you said yes because you were afraid of rejection? How often have you said no because you were afraid of commitment? Even on Paul’s list: I don’t think fits of anger because of injustice are misaligned by the Spirit. What would Paul say about Jesus flipping those tables at the temple? I don’t think people understanding their bodies and its desires is wrong. It can stem and build self-worth and self-compassion.

But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. When you live under the law, there is a narrow incomplete sense of right and wrong, an inherent this vs that that misses the in-between’s and the gray’s. The law is an attempt to quantify God’s justice and mercy. An attempt meaning it is imperfect and incomplete. It is only in living by the Spirit, living from a place of love and grace that we will exist in the kingdom of God. The kingdom of God is living with a faith that a compassionate and merciful God is in control.

Prayer: God I pray for freedom and faith to be led by the Spirit and to not be afraid of my desires. God I pray for a sensitivity to filter my desires so I know which lead to more love and which lead to more pain.

Character: What recent decision did I make out of fear?

Grace: What recent decision did I make from love?

CBG: Rest

May 17, 2020 — Leave a comment

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

Matthew 11:28-30

I come to the end of this week weary and tired. People talk of a second wind when you run long distances, when you suddenly get a spurt of energy that helps you finish the second half. I feel like this has been the opposite. A second wall, like we’re starting at scratch again, recalibrating again what this next season will be. We made it through spring and now we need to make it through summer.

I need the promises of this verse. I need the ease and rest of this verse. Yoke is a wooden harness that usually allows two oxen to work together. I imagine it is Jesus and I clicked into this harness, the wagon unevenly set behind him. I imagine the scene of Jesus carrying his own cross and I trying to help in the back, even though the bulk of the weight is on his shoulders. Then I imagine that Jesus had already done all that physical work and all that’s left of him and I is simply to love God and others. His yoke is not oppressive or burdensome. His yoke frees us. His yoke actually gives us rest. When we do the work of God, we get rest. There is a kind of work that leaves you tired and relieved at the end of the day. Am I participating in that kind of work right now? Or am I doing unnecessarily laboring? For who?

  1. What does rest feel like?
  2. Where are you laboring in vain, or at the core, only for your own gain?
  3. Where are you doing it all, when you can ask for help?
  4. What are your hopes for summer?
  5. What’s a character trait you hope to practice and develop this week?

CBG: Reciprocity

May 16, 2020 — Leave a comment

Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord. Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. Contribute to the needs of the saints and seek to show hospitality. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them. Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight. Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all. If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peacefully with all. Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.” To the contrary, if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

Romans 12:9-21

Here are the guidelines for living. You don’t need to do everything at once, and you probably should not and cannot. What part of this passage makes you angry because it feels too hard and too unfair? Never avenge yourselves? Be patient in tribulation? Overcome evil with good? A lot of this passage goes against my body when I’m gripping hard to my ego and my comforts. These encouragements are uncomfortable, are unfair. They require you to give up your status and ego. This is not giving up your power. It’s giving up your need to prove your power.

If there is a part of this passage that really irks — right now for me it’s live in harmony with one another – acknowledge the feelings. They are valid. What is that feeling trying to protect? What is this feeling afraid of losing if you actually abide by this verse? Do you need to hold onto this thing that you might lose? If you lose this thing, what do you need God to do to fill in the gap? What feeling emerges in the surrender?

Prayer: God I pray to love more, care more, rejoice and weep more, than I am resistant. God I pray for a greater capacity to surrender and give up present status for the sake of long-term health. God I pray for grace and patience with people who irk me to my core.

Character: Where am I gripping more than making room and loosening up?

Grace: What helps you take a breath and a moment before reacting?