devotional

Pleasure, Praise & Play

January 14, 2021 — Leave a comment

For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will — to praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves.

Ephesians 1:4-6

It is God’s pleasure and will to call us his children. It is out of God’s love that he brings us in. Our ability to praise God’s grace is even a thing God gives us. Pleasure, praise and love are given to us freely and extravagantly.

When was the last time you allowed yourself to feel pleasure, praise freely and love deeply?

Pleasure. What comes to mind for you when you meditate on that word? “I’m not allowed…” “That’s indulgent…” “It’s..dirty.” Do guilt, shame and suppression arise? God started with pleasure! We are part of God’s pleasure! We, too, are allowed to know what is pleasurable, seek after what feels like ease in our body. Pleasure is our inherent coherence with the divine.

Praise… of his glorious grace. There is humility when you praise of God’s grace. There is an awareness when you really hold God’s grace. Not for the grace of God, go I… How can we praise from this deep humility and awareness, aware that you are not entitled to anything and humbled that if it were not for the grace of God, you would not be here? How can be praise in such a way that invites others into God’s grace, not push them away because of tone-deafness, but rather with a desire to share, even give your joy so another can experience it as well?

Love. Love is dangerous. Love demands of us to give so much we risk getting hurt. Love is removing the armor and drawing near and close. Love hopes. Love sees the other with as much worth and ferocity as God sees them. Can you love in this explosive way?

Where can you invite pleasure into your life today? How can you praise through eyes of wonder? Who can you love today that demands faith and courage?

Divine Embodiment

January 13, 2021 — Leave a comment

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ.

Ephesians 1:3

There exists simultaneously this physical realm and the heavenly realms. Those moments when you are stunned and stopped by a beautiful sunset overlooking the seemingly unmoving waters feels like an intersection. That moment when you bump into the most unexpected person at the most ordinary of places and know deep in your heart that was meant to be: that’s a moment. That moment when a third space is created when you and another are so present it feels as if you are one is an intersection. These fully present divine moments have even happened on Zoom for me!

According to this version, in our heavenly realms, we are blessed with every spiritual blessing in Christ. We have a oneness. We have an abundance. We have all the traits listed in 1 Corinthians 13 regarding love: patience, kindness, forgiveness and all the fruits of the Spirit in Galatians 5: gentleness, self-control, faithfulness…and so forth. These are all ours. They are already our reality. But when our worldly/physical realm becomes the only thing occupying our mind and body, we lose access to all our spiritual blessings. We are dragged down by the circumstances of the present moment and pulled in all directions unsure of where our feet need to be rooted. The opposite can also be true. We can be so preoccupied with the heavenly realms that we lose touch with where God has placed us right now on earth. We can know these spiritual blessings yet they will have no potency in the present moment.

The task is to know both so well, to live in that intersection. How can I hold the present moment and my surroundings lightly, while allowing the peace and love that is divine and mine penetrate through me and into me? How can I be that porous with the divine world in this physical world? How can I find the divine in the profane and the physical in the sacred? Jesus was the perfect embodiment of divine humanity. How can we live that out?

Remember that Pivotal Moment

January 11, 2021 — Leave a comment

Remember those earlier days after you had received the light, when you endured in a great conflict full of suffering. Sometimes you were publicly exposed to insult and persecution; at other times you stood side by side with those who were so treated. You suffered along with those in prison and joyfully accepted the confiscation of your property, because you knew that you yourselves had better and lasting possessions. So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised. For, ‘In just a little while, he who is coming will come and will not delay.’ And, ‘But my righteous one will live by faith. And I take no pleasure in the one who shrinks back.’ But we do not belong to those who shrink back and are destroyed, but to those who have faith and are saved.

Hebrews 10:32-39

Remember when you were a kid and jumped four monkey bars because you had to and because you really believed you could make it? Remember when you were a kid and skateboarded and scraped your knees real bad, yet got back up and dared to get back on it? Remember when you first came to know God’s love? Where you were? Who you were with? What God said exactly to your aching, desperate heart? Remember how nothing of this world could pop that hope and joy of feeling so loved, seen and on mission? God had you. God saw you. God was pushing you onto a path that required insane faith and courage.

Remember those moments during the pandemic when you were so grateful you could connect with a friend, even though it was on shitty wifi over Zoom? Remember that first hug after months of not having hugged anyone? Remember that moment when you thought, oh even through this I can come out better and God is with me? Remember when you got so angry over the racism and killings? Remember when you vowed to give your life to a cause greater than yourself? Remember when you were on fire to protest even if it meant you might be called out for not knowing enough or not having done enough up till now? Remember when despite that fear, you went anyway because you trusted that these incremental steps of change were the most important? Remember when you pulled all those resources to make a difference for the elections? Remember when you felt that all this current pain is worth it?

As each day passes and explosive events evolve into daily occurrences that we are desensitized to, and our first impression fervor fades into acceptance or perhaps apathy, I pray we come back to that initial faith and fervor. I pray that we go back to that moment when God called you, God saw you and demanded that you know with all your being that you are called for something huge. I pray that we go back to that moment when we really believe that our actions and our words really matter and can impact in huge ways. I pray that acceptance of evil in the world and apathy in our hearts never have time to settle. I pray that we do the small incremental acts that change the community around us, and mostly change the heart within us. Let us remember who we have been called to be and persevere till we receive the prizes full.

Citizens of Two Worlds

January 8, 2021 — Leave a comment

But our citizenship is in heaven. And we eagerly await a Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ, who, by the power that enables him to bring everything under his control, will transform our lowly bodies so that they will be like his glorious body.

Philippians 3:20-21

We belong in heaven, not in the sense that we should be there, but that our home is already defined. We already belong and have a home where we are free, without having to further work for that. You don’t have to work for the citizenship; it’s given to you. There is no need for striving and evidence: you are a citizen of heaven.

However in the meantime, the other truth is that we are living on earth. If earth were not important and real, God would not have become human to walk amongst us. Our time on earth is that much more precious and beautiful. Jesus had 33 years on earth and he did not waste a moment. He didn’t take his time here for granted because he was living on purpose and from promise.

The pitfall of having citizenship in heaven is to neglect our time on earth. God has bestowed our truest identity and given us a sense of home so that when we are on earth, we can live out of that worth and not for worth. Nothing on earth will give us new worth; it’s been given, fully. If we can accept our fullness and beauty, how would we spend our time on earth differently? Look to Jesus — he didn’t hoard physical things and he respected the earth. How would we build relationships? Look to Jesus — he had strong intimate connections yet didn’t attach unhealthily and knew when we let go. How can we exemplify in the present our heavenly citizenship?

Hope is a Habit

January 6, 2021 — Leave a comment

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance, perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.

Romans 5:1-5

First forget inspiration. Habit is more dependable. Habit will sustain you whether you’re inspired or not. Habit will help you finish and polish your stories. Inspiration won’t. Habit is persistence in practice.

Octavia Butler

Before ALL else, we have to come back to our justification in Christ — that through the death and life of Jesus, we all have access to God. There is nothing we need to do besides believing that there is a God that loves us beyond our minds can comprehend. God loves us so much that he displayed a tangible example for our humans minds to comprehend. Because we are justified, we have faith and we have grace. Because we are justified, we have hope and we are marked by the last word of God, which is that good triumphs evil and love triumphs all. Out of this wholeness and faith, THEN, can we also boast in our suffering because we know in this context suffering builds us up. Suffering gives us habits and structures to get through every-changing circumstances with integrity and character. Suffering creates a moral road map for our ever straying hearts. When we endure and come back to the glory and justification of God in the midst of suffering, we are building incremental changes in ourselves that make hope more visible in this world. We do not suffer or persevere for its own sake; we do it all in and for hope. There will be moments when you don’t feel like going on. There will be times when you don’t feel led to persevere. Come back to the promises and days when you felt wrapped up in God’s hope and glory. Can you remember how you felt in those moments? Can you see how where you are not is so different than where you used to be? Can you see that even when you don’t feel it, God is at work? If in the valley, we can come back to our first truth of justification and find seeds of past & future promises, hope will eventually break through! Just look at Georgia!

Dream Away

January 5, 2021 — Leave a comment

And a woman was there who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years. She had suffered a great deal under the care of many doctors and had spent all she had, yet instead of getting better she grew worse. When she heard about Jesus, she came up behind him in the crowd and touched his cloak, because she thought, ‘If I just touch his clothes, I will be healed.’ Immediately her bleeding stopped and she felt in her body that she was freed from suffering. At once Jesus realized that power had gone out from him. He turned around in the crowd and asked, ‘Who touched my clothes?’ ‘You see people crowding against you,’ his disciples answered, ‘and yet you can ask, ‘Who touched me?” But Jesus kept looking around to see who had done it. Then the woman, knowing what had happened to her, came and fell at his feet and, trembling with fear, told him the whole truth. He said to her, ‘Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering.’

Mark 5:25-34

Focus more on your desire than on your doubt, and the dream will take care of itself.

Mark Twain

This passage is short. It can be easy to dismiss it quickly as just another miracle of Jesus. However if we step into this woman’s life and really see the impact of her actions, we would see how this woman led her life with hope. This woman had spent over a decade in pain. She spent over a decade looking for solutions, that all failed, that made her situation worse. She spent over a decade in isolation because in Jewish culture, bleeding woman had to be separated because they were considered dirty. She spent over a decade being identified as dirty, diseased, incurable, sick…Those are probably the kinder words used to describe her. If anyone should have given hope it should have been her. If anyone should say FUCK YOU WORLD, it should have been her. Yet her desire to be healed, her dream of being healed stayed in her all these years and she continued to follow that impulse. Some days maybe it was a flicker. Some days maybe it was a beaming light. Some days maybe the hope seemed to disappear. Yet when Jesus, potentially another ‘faith healer’, another dude who said, ‘I’m different, trust me, I can make your life different’, came to town, she went. She leapt and lead with her hope. It wasn’t even in spite of doubt. It was in spite of years of tangible proof of failure and zero results. But still she chose her dream over her doubt. She chose to believe in hope.

Someone who has been through the trenches and still leads in hope is outrageous to the world. This woman was outrageous in her dreams. She didn’t give a F about how people were going to see her. She came out into public and revealed herself, broke the “traditions” of isolation. She exposed herself. She shared her pain and need before the public that probably judged her prior and still in that moment. When Jesus asked, she spilled out her truth because she could not deny that she was living in a miracle. This woman was double healed. There is the healing and a double portion when she shared it. Her healing and power, and place in history were secure when she boldly admitted to her story.

I pray that we lead with hope, even when it feels outrageous. I pray that we feed out dreams and desires, the parts of us that bring pleasure and joy. I pray that we own our stories of pain and healing. I pray that when we see the power of God, we jump at it, to grab a piece for ourselves because it will only make our stories that much more miraculous and impactful for others watching & listening.

Choosing Love

January 4, 2021 — 1 Comment

If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.

1 Corinthians 13:1-3

Love takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within.

James Baldwin

We can have the power and purpose to impact people and the world, but without love, the barrier between humans remains and the connection that enables change cannot be formed. Love is what breaks down our defenses and armors so that we can actually be close enough to each other to see and know each other. Love translates our unique actions into the unique language our recipients can understand. Love removes fear so that play, innocence and leaps of faith can exist. Love removes the fear of not being enough, the fear of being seen and potentially rejected, the fear of doing it wrong, (as if there’s actually something such as doing it right), the fear that that where we are right now is off. Where you are right now reveals the insecurities, the heartaches and challenges that are building up your mask. With that awareness, you can have agency to choose love instead.

Choose love? That’s choosing your unchangeable worth and uniqueness ordained by God above all else. Choosing love is to see yourself the way God sees you — divine, done on purpose and delightful. Out of this knowing and love, we then break these manmade prisons that keep us separate and weary of each other. In this freedom, we then communicate, prophesy, perform miracles, give generously and endure all waves. Only when we recognize our own freedom and live into it can we seek to free others. That is our greatest calling: to usher others into their wholeness and freedom. To point people back to their Garden of Eden.

If you continue on in 1 Corinthians, you will find what love is. When you are not living in those — patience, kindness, opposite of envy, humility, and so forth — you are not in love. Will you dare to ask yourself why you are not living in and out of love? What mindset of comparison are you in? What unhealthy narratives are you imprisoned by? Where are you not believing God’s divine touch and making of you? Press in. Press through. You will find love right there.

Shine in Service

January 3, 2021 — Leave a comment

For what we preach is not ourselves, but Jesus Christ as Lord, and ourselves as your servants for Jesus’ sake. For God, who said, ‘Let light shine out of darkness,’ made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God’s glory displayed in the face of Christ. But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body.

2 Corinthians 4:5-10

2020 was a necessary year that showed us our own darkness and our capacity for light. I carry into 2021 the bruises, the breakdowns and the blessings of this past year. The lessons of exhaustion and helplessness are in my body. The feelings and visions of rage and injustice are in my bones. The promises of hope and renewal flow in my blood. Nothing is wasted. Nothing is by accident. We may be foolish and unwise, yet in God’s grace, even those things he can turn into treasures that light the way for a better tomorrow.

My prayer for 2021 is to choose vulnerability and kindness over natural inclinations to defend and shut down. I want to harness the power that is in me, in all of us, through the power of Jesus, for the sake of others. That is the ONLY use of that power. To be a vessel of God’s power is to be a light for the world. Shine my friends. When you sense Jesus’ death in your body, and it leads you to break when you see injustice, pain and suffering in the world, let that stir you into generosity, faithful action and brave connections. When you sense Jesus’ resurrection in your body, and it leads you to see how the pieces do come together and hope does have the last word, let that stir you to share that joy and peace. May we carry the depths of heartache and heights of hope in our body, minds and souls. May we be the #church that blesses the nation, not through super spreader rule-breaking worship concerts, but by being a light in service of others.

  1. What would it look like for you to shine in service of your community?
  2. Who dims that light? You? Loved ones? What does it look like to protect yourself from their shade?
  3. If today you were to choose kindness and vulnerability over the need to right and the need to look cool, what relationships would you work on? What projects? What purpose would you go after?

Do you have a word for the year? I’d love to hear it! xx

Warriors of Hope

October 15, 2020 — Leave a comment

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.

Romans 5:1-5

Suffering creates perseverance. Perseverance builds character. Character leads to hope. Hope is a byproduct of work, experience, and self-understanding. Hope is the thing that comes pouring out after all the striving, pushing through, climbing up, getting free. Hope is for warriors and survivors.

So for those of you out there, that continue to hope, you are brave. For those of you out there who dare to hope, you know how risky it is to keep your heart open and expectant. For the hopeful, you are an inspiration in this world that wants us to dream small and stay in our lane.

It takes a lot of courage to have hope because it’s scary to keep your heart open still.
It takes pain to still stand in hope because disappointment might be on the other side.
It takes character to be hopeful because it means choosing faith over circumstances.

I pray that even as your shoulders hunch over and you lie fetal position in your bed, you dare to ask for hope. I pray that even when your heart is broken, you dare to hope again. I pray that even when it feels like an uphill battle, you dare to hope out of the trenches, up the mountain to see what awaits. Those that hope in this dark world are the lights we need; we need you and your hope.

Blessed in the Mess

October 8, 2020 — Leave a comment

My heart is in anguish within me; the terrors of death have fallen on me. Fear and trembling have beset me; horror has overwhelmed me. I said, ‘Oh, that I had the wings of a dove! I would fly away and be at rest. I would flee far away and stay in the desert; I would hurry to my place of shelter, far from the tempest and storm.’
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As for me, I call to God, and the Lord saves me. Evening, morning and noon I cry out in distress, and he hears my voice. He rescues me unharmed from the battle waged against me, even though many oppose me. God, who is enthroned from of old, who does not change — he will hear them and humble them, because they have no fear of God.
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Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken. But you, God, will bring down the wicked into the pit of decay; the bloodthirsty and deceitful will not live out half their days. But as for me, I trust in you.

Psalm 55

Exhaustion brews in the air. Dreaming of escaping the exhaustion takes even more work. How can I rest right here? How can I rest in the midst of my heart feeling anguish? How can I rest in the center of fear and trembling?

Try not to run away. Try not to flee. Cry out, yes, but escape, no. Cry out every hour. Cast the burdens. Cast the fears. Cast the things you care about down. Those are weighing you down. Those are holding you back. Those are trapping you in the exhaustion and the circumstances.

You will not be shaken even as the waves come crashing near. You will make it even when it feels like your legs might give way. You will be carried because that is the kind of God that is looking after us. God is unchanging even as we storm in with all our mess. He takes that mess and shows us how we can be blessed.