CBG: Promises

Then the foremen of the people of Israel came and cried to Pharaoh, “Why do you treat your servants like this? No straw is given to your servants, yet they say to us, ‘Make bricks!’ And behold, your servants are beaten; but the fault is in your own people.” But he said, “You are idle, you are idle; that is why you say, ‘Let us go and sacrifice to the Lord.’ Go now and work. No straw will be given you, but you must deliver the same number of bricks.” The foremen of the people of Israel saw that they were in trouble when they said, “You shall by no means reduce your number of bricks, your daily task each day.” They met Moses and Aaron, who were waiting for them, as they came out from Pharaoh; and they said to them, “The Lord look on you and judge, because you have made us stink in the sight of the Pharaoh and his servants, and have put a sword in their hand to kill us.” Then Moses turned to the Lord and said, “O, Lord, why have you done evil to this people? Why did you ever send me? For since I came to Pharaoh to speak in your name, he has done evil to his people, and you have not delivered your people at all.”

Exodus 5:15-23

It’s at this point that the foremen recognizes that the Hebrews are a stink in the sight of the Pharaoh and that death was awaiting them. The Hebrews had been in slavery for centuries. They have always been a stink in the sight of the Pharaoh, yet now they express how much the Pharaoh doesn’t care about the Hebrews’ well-being. The foremen are pissed. Had they been tolerating and making the best of their reality up until now? Had they been trying to get on the Pharaoh’s good side and slowly hope for changes, and now that’s thrown out the window? Regardless, they are angry because they are given an impossible task that most probably will lead to their deaths.

But if they didn’t see death so clearly, would they have ever risked going into the desert with Moses, a runway Hebrew/Egyptian murderer? If they had not felt so clearly that they were either going to die in the hands of the Egyptians as slaves or die trying to be free, would they have chosen the latter? Any notions that this system the Hebrews are working under will get better or is tolerable, are wiped away with the Pharaoh’s unjust new commands. The Hebrews are becoming more and more certain that they can no longer live under this oppression.

But the middle from the oppression to the promise land can be arduous and uncomfortable. Things can seem wrong. Leaders might not be trusted immediately because the leaders themselves might be afraid. Everyone here is taking steps of faith, coming back to the promises of God. Coming back to the promises of God during times of oppression and hard DOES NOT MAKE SENSE to those who live by human reasoning. Coming back to the promises of God, and trusting and asking for his moves requires a faith and courage that you feel you don’t have. Because this is an impossible task. No one without God can walk through the Red Sea. But God was there and God is here. God hears the voice of the oppressed and his plans thwart any human predictions. God will lead us through the valleys and shadows into a land full of milk and honey.

Prayer: God bring me back to your promises of deliverance and of wholeness. Give me courage and patience to endure even when I feel misunderstood and judged by those I love.

When have you said this to God, why did you ever send me?

CBG: Liberation

One day, when Moses had grown up, he went out to his people and looked on their burdens, and he saw an Egyptian beating a Hebrew, one of his people. He looked this way and that, and seeing no one, he struck down the Egyptian and hid him in the sand. When he went out the next day, behold, two Hebrews were struggling together. And he said to the man in the wrong, “Why do you strike your companion?” He answered, “Who made you a prince and a judge over us? Do you mean to kill me as you killed the Egyptian?” Then Moses was afraid, and thought, “Surely the thing is known.” When Pharaoh heard of it, he sought to kill Moses. But Moses fled from Pharaoh and stayed in the land of Midian. And he sat down by a well. Now the priest of Midian had seven daughters, and they came and drew water and filled the troughs to water their father’s flock. The shepherds came and drove them away, but Moses stood up and saved them, and watered their flock. When they came home to their father Reuel, he said, “How is it that you have come home so soon today?” They said, “An Egyptian delivered us out of the hand of the shepherds and even drew water for us and watered the flock.” He said to his daughters, “Then where is he? Why have you left the man? Call him, that he may eat bread.” And Moses was content to dwell with the man, and he gave Moses his daughter Zipporah. She gave birth to a son, and he called his name Gershom, for he said, “I have been a sojourner in a foreign land.”

Exodus 2:11-22

Moses desire to help doesn’t always pan out. Even though he was raised in the Pharaoh’s house, he counted himself a Hebrew and avenged the beating of his own people by killing an Egyptian. Even though Moses was Hebrew by blood and nurture, his fellow Hebrews do not count allegiance with him or respect him. He’s neither accepted with the Egyptians or with the Hebrews. He runs away and once again, stands up for the daughters of Midian. They assume him an Egyptian and Moses knows even with a Midian wife and a Midian son, he is but a sojourner in a foreign land.

Born out of water, Moses neither fits smoothly here or there. He had access to a people by blood/nature and to an upbringing because of compassion. He had a wonderful education, food on the table, a beautiful roof over his head and one day, when he was grown up, he finally saw the oppression and he acted. (Though poorly.) You are not faulted for the privilege and access you have been given. However, when you are grown up and become aware of the oppression, you are now responsible and culpable. Your initial actions to “help the oppressed” might not be received well, might actually do more harm than good. Those you want to “help” might not see you as an ally. Don’t simply help. Take your help and toss it in the trash. See the pain of the oppressed as your own oppression, so much that it springs you into wanting to destroy the reality of the oppression (not necessarily the oppressor.) Don’t help because you are looking from the outside but act because in acting you are creating liberation for all, including yourself! No one is free when others are oppressed. (Unknown)

When you are misunderstood and hated, it feels heart-wrenching and lonely. It can feel like what has been done wasn’t worth it. The waking up to reality isn’t worth it. But remember this, you have been freed. Freed from the fog, freed from this in-between, freed from ignorance. Plus you are a sojourner in a foreign land. Your home in heaven is secure and you will never be separated from God. This pain is temporary. Still do compassion.

Prayer: God I pray for a grace and a kindness when I feel misunderstood. God I pray for a comfort and security in you as my judge when I feel unseen and misunderstood. God I pray even still, I will act with kindness and compassion.

How do you respond when you feel misunderstood?

Day 29: Brought out to be set apart

Exodus 35-40; Psalm 29

The people are to give according to how their heart is stirred. How do we measure that stirring? How do we straddle sacrifice and generosity? How much do we give to exhibit our commitment?

God’s laws set us apart. We are to be known by God’s law. God’s law should make us attractive in order to fulfill the covenant of multiplying our numbers. God’s law isn’t only to shape us in the present, but to remind us of what’s to come. I like this concept of his law. It’s the training, the discipline, the way to move that transform us. When you follow something long enough, it becomes second nature. I don’t have to walk around a store and constantly remind myself not to steal. If you are living and breathing love and compassion, you shouldn’t need to pray about giving our compassion and love. It should be second-nature. Your heart should naturally stir for you to give.

Goodbye Exodus. It’s been real and bits boring. It’s been upsetting and scary watching God be that angry and sad. It’s been patient to journey with the Israelites in the wilderness. Exodus,you are tiredsome and specific, but it all points to a long suffering grace that is God.

Day 23: Rules, Rules, Rules

Exodus 19-21; Psalm 23

Here comes the rules. Rules are a imperfect manifestation of wisdom and social justice and goodness. It’s a way of making sense of a less tangible sense of holiness and right way of living. It’s an asymptote to living for God. If we follow all the rules but without consent and knowing the heart behind them, it’s not love. It feels like prison and a system of trying not to cross the line. I’m not saying rules are bad. If you look at the rules and commandments and understand this helps us prioritize God before self, this helps us trust our provision, this teaches relational goodness, and you agree with the foundation of these said commandments, then you’re not following out of obligation but rather living according to a good way. So don’t fall pray to a need to follow 10 commandments and 52 other ones to be a “person of God.” What do the commandments say about God, you and people? How does each commandment help us live in just relationship with God, others and ourselves? Because when Jesus comes he revamps these rules, not by abolishing them but actually by revealing the impossible-like heart of God’s way. Do not lust? Damn that covers a lot of ground and makes us really think through our ideas of intimacy, relationship and love. Forgive fully? Damn that makes us rethink reparations, revenge, Grace, mercy and endurance. Those ideas are big and broad and require wisdom and freedom and a continual conversation with God. I can follow rules; now living a life where each moment is surrendered to God’s wisdom and freedom? That requires faith.

Day 21: How to read without discarding God

Exodus 13-15; Psalm 21

I don’t like this God of war. I’m not sure how to receive all that he does here. Unless, one I discard this story, which Bible people say you can’t. You can’t just pick and choose stories in the Bible because in essence you are creating the God that fits YOU. And how much can we really trust ourselves? There should be a level of discomfort when we make ourselves better, more in line with wholeness, goodness, compassion, kindness, all the above that God is from the beginning. So this God of war and God who hardens the Egyptians are really messing with me. I either have to take this story or throw away the God. Can I interpret this story in light of God’s character? A God of war that fits into a God of compassion… Can this tale be a metaphor? Does it remind us how prisons and past lifestyles grip us and don’t want to let us go? Does it tell us to keep signs of how God has freed us? What have we been freed from? What’s a sign of that, that we can bring up time and time again so we don’t lose sight of that redemptive God? Does it also show us how quickly we forget all that God has done for us? How quickly we see the power of God and go back to complaining about the little things and doubting?

Seeing this more as a metaphor of God’s power and love instead of taking it so literally help me make sense of it. It still doesn’t sit 100% well with me. Is that because the wars and revenge of my current world really suck? I’m part of the oppressive nation. In my current world, we are the Egyptians.

Day 20: The discomfort of God’s judgment

Exodus 10-12; Psalm 20

I may never fully understand how God could kill all the firstborn of Egypt. How could he murder all those people, regardless of they were evil or not? How could he cause such sorrow and suffering? Is this how vindication and justice look — unfair and cruel? How do I reconcile the God I believe to hold (kind, forgiving, gracious, patient) with this God who kills children and adult? It’s a sign that calls people to repentance. Is that enough? So we sacrifice a few for the many? Was there no other option? Hm. Maybe this was the only option to free the oppressed? Revenge on the oppressors’ children? I don’t know. It’s part like this in the Bible that make my head hurt and I want to discard God’s actions. If he is good, how can this section be good as well? Someone help me understand!

Of course this all points to Jesus, God’s firstborn. He allows for him to die for the sake of us all. His sacrifice covers any judgment we might have received from God. This aspect of Jesus also seems grueling and hard for me. How can I take from this sacrificial love? Is it literal? Yea… But I think Jesus fulfills more than a blood sacrifice so God no longer condemns us to hell — it’s rather the depths and lengths that God would go to remind us of his love. Kill his son? Hold to his holiness while bridging us imperfect to him? Jesus both holy and able to be with the imperfect. May we be like that!! May whatever we touch also turn good and feel a surge of power and life!

Day 19: Freedom & Slavery

Exodus 7-9; Psalm 19

The Pharaoh put his people’s life in danger because of his damn ego. Was it that important to him to keep an enslaved people that hated him? He didn’t believe the signs of Moses and Aaron because he saw the same signs done by his people. So even when his own team of slytherin couldn’t reproduce the same plagues, he remained stubborn?

In what areas of our heart have we chosen our own ego and proud over the goodness of things and people in our responsibility? In what areas do we question the God of the gospels by pointing to results from other sources? How have we lessened the power of God by crowding our space with lesser powers that do in fact bring about miracles? How can we tell which is of God and which is not?

PS Aaron and Moses are in the 80s. It’s never too late to do the thing your life was made for.

I desire for the power of the Scriptures that Psalm 19 exclaims. I want to see the the Grace, compassion, righteousness (not self-righteousness) exude from me as I choose God over the ways of this world that are only for my happiness. Help me to decipher areas in my heart that are selfish and may the Word of God continue to lead, guide, and shape me into a defiant and radical woman of freedom.

The contrast of slavery in Egypt and the freedom from the Scripture. Where am I trapped and don’t know it? Where am I freer than I allow myself? Where am I hardened and need to be softened? Where am I not owning the choices and paths that are good?

Day 18: God hardens & softens

Exodus 4-6; Psalm 18

I’ve always found God hardening the Pharaoh’s heart harsh and unfair. Did God choose to eliminate this man to save other people? Does God already destine some people to be evil and die? Does God sacrifice the one for the many? Well, he does do that last one with Jesus. But Jesus came back to life; will the Pharaoh come back to life? Hm. Maybe. We don’t know from this passage what happens to the Pharaoh after the Israelites escape. All we know is that at this point in time, his heart was hardened.

  • Did God tell Moses this to give him a heads up and lessen the blow when the Pharaoh refuses to listen? God hardened the Pharaoh’s heart. Was this more of a premonition or a psychic reading of the future? If God is holy, good and true, what does it mean that he hardened someone’s heart? What if hardening one’s heart isn’t actually evil, but a state a heart might need to go to in order to find healing at the end? What if the hardening allows for the greatest softening later?
  • Often we approach hard scriptures in the Bible and either dismiss them or say, well God knows best. Clearly we can interpret in ways that protect where we stand. How can we see The Bible as a way to affirm God’s unfailing and relentless love, while remembering each story and statue must be placed in the context of redemption? The goal is redemption and touching Jesus to experience the wholeness we are created in.
  • Day 17: Forget me not

    Exodus 1-3; Psalm 17

    God heard Israel’s cry for help from slavery and he remembered his covenant. I mean I don’t think God forgot; as if he had turned away, was listening to some other kind of music and Israel’s crying suddenly jolted back to his original plan. God doesn’t forget and his timing is perfect. So in light of his unchanging qualities, how can we see this? This was the ripe time to take his next action. The people were so aware of their oppressed reality. It’s hard to get people to change when they don’t know they need the change. You can’t pull people out when they don’t realize they’re stuck in a bad way. God remembered. He didn’t forget. He simply brought it back to the forefront so that he could share exactly what Moses needed to hear. God doesn’t forget. He always has the best plan, the original plan at hand. It’s that he knows the best time to strike. He did here with the right person: someone who had a blemished past, who needed refuge, who straddles two cultures, not really belonging in either fully. He was the unexpected bridge who could be an instrument because clearly the good and miracles out of him were not from him. They are from above. How can I get to a state of humble desperation? What unexpected circles have I had access to and can now have positive influence?

    A little bit of the Psalm. I love the last bit about how David will behold God and in return he will be excited about his likeness. You know how couples or owners and dogs end up looking alike? The thing we hold, admire, keep close the most is the thing we become and when we look in the mirror hopefully we’re excited. When you behold a kind, compassionate, powerful God, hopefully you become more like that. God may I behold you and be more and more excited by the person I see in the mirror.