humility

The Effort of Living

February 8, 2021 — Leave a comment

As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.

Ephesians 4:1-3

A life worthy of God’s calling requires humility, gentleness, patience and effort to keep the unity by living though the bond of peace. This takes effort. This takes work and heavy lifting. Sometimes who you have to bear in love feels heavier than you have the strength to take on. To live a calling is to choose it in every moment, in every relationship and every circumstance. Within that choice are moments when you choose otherwise; that does not remove your blessing or calling. Each moment and choice is a reminder that there is always a way worthy of your calling, and God encourages you to step in the direction of that bigness.

A word on peace. Peace is not hushing injustice. Rather it is taking action against injustice that seeks to disturb our bond of unity and alignment with God. Peace is not passive. It is a constant recalibration to God’s heart that all of humanity is honored and have access to God. Peace is not smiles and empty sayings. Peace is not the absence of conflict; conflict is a reflection of where we need to come back into alignment with God. Peace is here and not yet. We are constantly living in that tension because this world is not always living up to the calling its been called to exist within.

I pray that we are peace creators and upholders, and when that means we need to step into areas of conflict, dissonance and disturbance, we do that with humility, gentleness and patience. Our hearts desire peace, and if we want a genuine lasting kind that permeates our space and our body, we need to address what is not right and not simply ignore and pretend everything is fine.

CBG: Judgment

April 30, 2020 — Leave a comment

I wrote to you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people — not at all meaning the sexually immoral of this world, or the greedy and swindlers, or idolaters, since then you would need to go out of the world. But now I am writing to you not to associate with anyone who bears the name of brother if he is guilty of sexual immorality or greed, or is an idolater, reviler, drunkard, or swindler — not even eat with such a one. For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Is it not those inside the church whom you are to judge? God judges those outside. “Purge the evil person from among you.”

1 Corinthians 5:9-13

My blood boils. The intolerance. The judgment. The contradictions in this compared to Paul’s previous statement about not judging. I keep reading the verses to understand. I read it again, through the “lenses of a good compassionate God.” I read the whole passage — okay, this was in the context of Paul addressing a man sleeping with his stepmom. Okay, okay? This passage still pisses me off. What about that plank in your own eye, Paul?! Church people?!

Can I toss this passage away? Why was it included? Because a set of old white men decided what should be the canon?! Why was this included? What does it reveal about Paul? About us? About God?

Look out: Paul was on the far, far other side before Jesus. He was a proud, angry, over-educated man of society. I wonder if he still carries those traits into his new self. I wonder if his “passion” and once-again certainty makes him say things without thinking about the emotional impact of others. I wonder if he’s so desperate for people to know a transformative Jesus that he himself is impatient when he doesn’t see how others aren’t already on the same page as him. Paul is flawed. Paul is imperfect. Paul can be wrong.

Look in: …name of brother if he is guilty of sexual immorality or greed, or is an idolater, reviler, drunkard, or swindler — Christian, you are that brother. How quick we are to point to that person whether it’s in pity or in disgust. How quick we are to judge and dissociate. Are we cutting others out to protect our image and flow? Or is knowledge of another’s behavior information for us to tailor our acts of grace and patience for them? Is knowledge of another’s behavior fuel for us to take personal responsibility to be less greedy, less manipulative, more careful with our words and more focused on God’s call on us?

Look up, in & out: God can handle our questions and our doubts. God doesn’t fit in human wisdom. God’s grace and compassion are boundless. God warns to draw in. God love to change. God shifts our behavior, our thoughts, our whole beings.

Prayer: God help us move from anger to action. God remove the parts of us that want to be tribal. God help us work through uncomfortable relationships.

Character: Who have you been judging? What does your judgment reveal about you?

Grace: Where do you feel not enough for God and for others? How are those exact places your unique power for the community?

CBG: Humility

April 28, 2020 — Leave a comment

So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interest of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not county equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.

Philippians 2:1-8

On those fuck the world days, this passage is irritating and feels overindulgent, a passage meant only for those with no worries and so much #SoBlessed. On days when I’m not incessantly fending off lies about my worth and instead feel a softness in my heart to receive wisdom from above, this passage carries an impossible task written for a fairy-tale world, and I live in a real, real-messy land.

What is it about humility that offends our nature? Why is it so preached yet rarely ever experienced? Yet the greatest leaders among us are usually marked with this coveted trait.

It’s a long-enduring work-in-progress character journey that involves ever-evolving antagonists and obstacles. Humility wins don’t come with fanfare and victory marches. It’s a surrender of power. It’s a choosing of an inner power over an outward display. Humility is often misjudged by those who are wrapped up in their own egos, (which is most of us). Others’ projections can make us feel that humility is insignificant, even laughable. Humility is always uncomfortable and vulnerable. It makes another feel space and power, and that can be risky for our space and power. If humility comes with such grueling work, why pursue it?

It pulls you more into a centeredness that makes you firm in all circumstances. It grows your empathy to see all as part of the same humanity. It focuses you on your calling, your purposes. It gives you greater access to forgiveness and awareness of judgement. Its presence, even if you are not aware of it, and usually you shouldn’t be, transforms those around you. It is the ultimate display of immovable power and identity.

Prayer: Only by your grace and Spirit can I even inch into this kind of character and living. Help me to surrender where I sense helplessness. Help me to encourage where my words can soothe. Help me to step back where I do not belong. Help me God.

Creative: Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interest of others. — Make a list of both and compare.

Brave: emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant — Where can you surrender status?

Generous: complete my joy by being of the same mind — Who needs you to remind them they are not alone?

Day 46: Poor Moses

January 31, 2019 — Leave a comment

Numbers 19-21; Psalm 46

Sometimes our leaders get angry and do something they’re not supposed to and fall. Sometimes our leaders want our good so much, or they think they do, they do something off. It happens and yes they are human and they should be forgiven, but there are consequences. Sometimes they don’t get to go to the Promise Land. Sometimes they are humbled and become just like one of us. Sometimes they are fully restored like King David. Sometimes they die like Judas. Who knows why? It sometimes feels really unfair? Why do some get away with it? Why do some get forgiven? Why do some die? I don’t know and I wish I had the answer, too.

So you just be on the look out for your own behavior. You stand with integrity. Instead of only pointing the finger and exclaiming how these leaders have failed, what’s the lesson? Where can you take ownership? It should humble you. See the only place you can’t fall from is the ground.