Nehemiah

CBG: Reflection

June 14, 2020 — Leave a comment

They read from the book, from the Law of God, clearly, and they gave the sense, so that the people understood the reading. And Nehemiah, who was the governor and Ezra the priest and scribe, and the Levites who taught the people said to all the people, “This day is holy to the Lord your God; do not mourn or weep.” For all the people wept as they heard the words of the Law. Then he said to them, “Go your way. Eat the fat and drink sweet wine and send portions to anyone who has nothing ready, for this day is holy to our Lord. And do not grieved, for the joy of the Lord is your strength,” So the Levites calmed all the people, saying, “Be quiet, for this day is holy; do not be grieved.” And all the people went their way to eat and drink and to send portions and to make great rejoicing, because they had understood the words that were declared to them. On the second ay the heads of fathers’ houses of all the people, with the priests and the Levites, came together to Ezra the scribe in order to study the words of the Law.

Nehemiah 8:8-13

Last night I went to a block party where neighbors and people who have heard about this party came out on the streets of St. James and Greene to dance, cheer bus drivers who drove by and listen to speeches of Black leaders. When I first got there, I was self-conscious because I didn’t know the purpose of the event. They have this every night. I found a friend of a friend and felt a bit safer. Then I saw a young girl dancing without bounds. I stepped then stepped, stepped. Then I joined the cheering as the B52 bus drove down Greene. Then I threw my hands up for Michelle Obama’s “we go high” words. My heart warmed hearing Andrew Cuomo’s words about the love in New York, New York strong.

This was joy and community personified. All ages. All races. All kinds of dance moves. This gave life. It reminded me why we fight: for each other, for this speck of heavenly joy on earth which is possible only if it is possible for everyone. JOY is heaven on earth.

JOY must be at the center of our work. JOY must be why we fight. JOY must be where we fight from. JOY is our rest. JOY is our motivation. JOY is the fire beneath our fight and our work. It will sustain us on this journey to fight against oppression and to expand love to the ends of the earth.

  1. When have you felt a joy this week that made you lit up to fight?
  2. When have you felt a joy this week that made you grateful for life right now?
  3. When have you felt a joy that made a lack of plans an exciting adventure?
  4. When have you felt a joy that exposed the path you are to walk?

CBG: Public Pause

June 11, 2020 — Leave a comment

And they said to me, “The remnant there in the province who had survived the exile is in great trouble and shame. The wall of Jerusalem is broken down, and its gates are destroyed by fire.”

As soon as I heard these words I sat down and wept and mourned for days, and I continued fasting and praying before the God of heaven. And I said, “O Lord God of heaven, the great and awesome God who keeps covenant and steadfast love with those who love him and keep his commandments, let your ear be attentive and your eyes open, to hear the prayer of your servant that I now pray before you day and night for the people of Israel your servants, confessing the sins of the people of Israel, which we have sinned against you. Even I and my father’s house have sinned. We have acted very corruptly against you and have not kept the commandments, the statutes, and the rules that you commanded your servant Moses. Remember the word that you commanded your servant Moses, saying, ‘If you are unfaithful, I will scatter you among the peoples, but if you return to me and keep my commandments and do them, though your outcasts are in the uttermost parts of heaven, from there I will gather them and bring them to the place that I have chosen, to make my name dwell there.’ They are your servants and your people, whom you have redeemed by your great power and by your strong hand. O Lord, let your ear be attentive to the prayer of your servant, and to the prayer of your servants who delight to fear your name, and give success to your servant today, and grant him mercy in the sight of this man.” Now I was the cupbearer to the king.

Nehemiah 1:2-11

Nehemiah knew that the king was somehow the answer to his problem. He knew that this person that he had gained access, intimate access to, was a key in the freedom of his people. But Nehemiah didn’t ask the king right then, right there to help. He didn’t ask the next week or the next month. It was months later that he finally found the right timing and right moment to ask for exactly what he needed.

I wonder how Nehemiah felt in those between months of knowing there was oppression and not doing anything about it. Well, at least, publicly. I wonder how the people who told him about the oppression felt about Nehemiah’s lack of action. Well, at least, publicly. I wonder how the king was witnessing Nehemiah’s shift because it was the king who eventually saw Nehemiah’s overt sorrow and pain on his face. That was super public.

Did Nehemiah feel guilt? Did he feel like he wasn’t doing enough? Did he feel judged for still living his life as if things hadn’t changed? Was he a coward or was he waiting for the proper time to drop a radical ask? Was he apathetic or was he having heart transformations privately? Was he nervous about what people thought about him or was he unmoved because he was centered on his goal and purpose? Both? Yes and yes? And yes and yes. What mattered was when he was put right on the spot, he had an answer. When his skill and the opportunity aligned, he didn’t miss a beat.

How are you feeling about your timing? How are you holding your responsibility in the face of oppression? How are you sustaining between seeing the reality of injustice and doing the thing YOU are called to do?

Prayer: God, you are the judge and no other. May that give me wisdom, courage and humility.

Who or what do you believe holds the answer to a pain you have right now?

CBG: Patience

May 22, 2020 — Leave a comment

The words of Nehemiah the son of Hacaliah. Now it happened in the month of Chislev, in the twentieth year, as I was in Susa the citadel, that Hanani, one of my brothers, came with certain men from Judah. And I asked them concerning the Jews who escaped, who had survived the exile, and concerning Jerusalem. And they said to me, “The remnant there in the province who had survived the exile is in great trouble and shame. The wall of Jerusalem is broken down, and its gates are destroyed by fire.” As soon as I heard these words I sat down and wept and mourned for days, and I continued fasting and praying before the God of heaven…O Lord let your ear be attentive to the prayer of your servant, and to the prayer of your servants who delight to fear your name, and give success to your servant today, and grant him mercy in the sight of this man.” Now I was the cupbearer to the king. In the month of Nisan, in the twentieth year of King Artaxerxes, when was was before him, I took up the wine and gave it to the king. Now I had not been sad in his presence. And the king said to me, “Why is your face sad, seeing you are not sick?” This is nothing but sadness of the heart.” Then I was much very much afraid. I said to the king, “Let the king live forever! Why should not my face by sad when the city, the place of my fathers’ graves, lies in ruins and its gates have been destroyed by fire?” Then the king said to me, “What are you requesting?”

Nehemiah 1:1-4, 11-2:4

Between the report Nehemiah received in Chislev (November/December) and his request to the king in Nisan (March/April) is 4 months. During that waiting period, Nehemiah, wept, mourned, prayed, fasted and also attended to his duties. As soon as the King asked him what he wanted, Nehemiah laid out his plans. And the king granted him what he asked.

Patience isn’t sedentary. It’s not doing nothing in hopes that something will spring out of zero. Patience is simmering and preparing one’s heart for the right moment to take action. Patience is acting from a place of preparedness. Patience requires faith that we do not dictate diving timing, whereas we live under its reign. Patience is trusting that there is a script beyond our mini scenes and the few characters we get to interact with; that if we allow it, we will see a whole greater narrative unfold without us getting in the way of it. Patience is choosing the collective long-term good over one’s immediate comforts and desires. Patience is the inhale of a situation and an exhale of how I am feeling, before another inhale of how are they feeling and an exhale of what do we need here. Soon, the breaths will ease their way into action. Do we have the faith to make space for the breaths?

Prayer: God help me to breathe before speaking, breathe before judging, breathe before acting. God help me to trust your divine timing and help me to let go of my plans that come from fear or a need to control. God help me to honor what is currently on my plate while stilling holding close the desires of my heart.

Character: Where am I holding my breath because I want to hold control?

Grace: Where have former prayers and dreams transition into actualizations?