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Day 40: Boring Bible

January 25, 2019 — Leave a comment

Numbers 1-4; Psalm 40

Counting men. Order. Organizing. As the Israelites are about to embark on their journey into the wilderness, it first begins with a very detailed structure. Honestly I haven’t gained that much umph from these four chapters. It’s kinda boring. I don’t really care. I wonder if there have been passionate sermons on the first four chapters of Numbers.

In this Psalm, it acknowledges that God does not want burnt offerings. What God delights in is us following him and being an example everywhere we go so others are drawn in. We Are the living sacrifices. We are an offering. We are God’s. May our lips speak of God’s goodness. May our actions showcase those who are grateful and redeemed. May humility be what goes before everything we do.

Day 39: C’est le vie Leviticus

January 24, 2019 — Leave a comment

Leviticus 26-27; Psalm 39

The valuation of humans in this section is implorable. The sacrifices in this book are weird AF. Relative to the other sacrifices happening around, the context the Israelites are in in this world of sacrifices to the Gods, this May seem radical. But if something is ugly but it’s not as ugly as the thing next to it, does it make it less ugly? Yes I understand the heart of this is about how pure and holy God is and how wicked and childish we are, but really…? Goodness the valuation of humans — men more than women, adults better than youth, the power of the priests to determine how much a person is worth. Bible scholars tell me how this is good? Don’t tell me, in other cultures women were valued at 0 so now that they’re 30 shekels, it’s pretty cool! Wtf.

Tell me this is all a set up to prove how amazing Jesus is. In Jesus women and children and sojourners are valued just the same, if maybe even more… they’re not valued more because they’re worth more, but in a patriarchal, misogynistic, ageist society, valuing something more just gives them a fair chance. You don’t need to value what’s already in the power seat. They are the status quo. We have to value the vulnerable to give them the room and space. Tell me Leviticus exists to point to the simplicity, justice and power of Jesus. Tell me this weird as F chapter points to how radical Jesus is. But is Jesus radical only in relativism? Or is he truly radical objectively?

Day 38: Strangers & Sojourners

January 23, 2019 — 1 Comment

Leviticus 24-25; Psalm 38

If we lose sight of the heart of God for his people in reading his commandments, we will be offended and disgusted by God. God goes on and on and on about what? Justice. Redemption. Generosity. The interdependence of humanity. If we hold to our dependence on each other, and love each other as we love ourselves (when we have self-love) would it not cover all these relational commandments? If we love, would we not cheat our brother? If we love, would we not cheat on our sister? If we love, would we not ask and give forgiveness? If we love would we not split our piece of toast so that everyone can have a bite? If we love ourselves, would we not harm it? If we love ourselves, would we grow awareness of how our bodies speak to us? If we love, would we not essentially live the commandments of God? God’s commandments seem nit picky and at times weird. When people say love has no borders, it means that we love each person as if we really see their divine created-ness. But love has boundaries. We don’t condone adultery or injustice or greed or bitterness or harm. If we don’t have these boundaries, how do we know what sacrificial love look like? Love has no borders but is rooted by boundaries.

I love that God reminds us that we are strangers and sojourners with God. This means that no matter where we go, we are known and loved and found. No matter where we go, we are home when we are with God. A sojourner with God — a brave faithful adventurer that has eyes on the horizon! A stranger with God — a curious, open member of society ready to connect not for worth but because of divine worth.

Day 37: Righteous beggars

January 22, 2019 — 1 Comment

Leviticus 21-23; Psalm 37

Sometimes I really hate reading verses like the righteous have no lack, they never have to beg, the wicked will die, and so forth because when I look out at this earth, that’s just not true. The racism, sexism, poverty, mass incarceration, homeless and so forth in this country DO LACK. Many who are “righteous” are begging on the street. So what is this Psalm trying to tell us? I am not going to doubt someone’s righteousness by their current earthly state. We do that sometimes don’t we? We see someone suffering or in need and we might think they must be off with God. We see someone not getting the abundances of this world and think they must be in sin. We can take verses like these and do the flip side — judge the inside by what you see on the outside. Let me tell you: this outside world is wicked and there are some sick rules and systems we live in. Those who are righteous do not always get vindicated in this life and that sucks. Those who are righteous do suffer on earth. So what is it that they do not lack? So what is it that they do not need to beg for? Grace? Integrity? Their conscience? Their worth? The righteous know their worth even if those around them don’t acknowledge it. Hold on. Keep on. Persevere. Endure! You are worthy!

Day 36: Stop tattooing your bodies Christians

January 21, 2019 — Leave a comment

Leviticus 19-20; Psalm 36

The Bible says to not tattoo our body. How many Christians ignore that and tat it up? Oh but the part about a male lying with another male as an abomination, we go up in arms against the LBGTQ community. Hm. I also don’t want to fall into the track of picking and choosing what to believe? What do I do with this? How can I read all of and hear the heart of the message? Context.

So God is speaking specifically to the Israelites in the wilderness. They’re a traveling nation of way too many people and need some guidance to get to the promise land. God’s laws are to remind them that they are to be a nation set apart to show the compassion and rescue of God. How does tattooing their body affect that? What is it really trying to protect the people of? How does the talk around various sexual relations help these people get to the promise land? I honestly don’t know. But if we had thrown out the tattoo part, can we not throw out the man lying with man part? Is it really talking about gay sex?

If Jesus came to be make us holy and to set us apart, can we throw away all these very specific commandments from the OT? But I also don’t want to believe that I serve a God who had these prejudices and biases. FML.

All I know is I am to love people like they are already enough and created in the image of God because God has deemed me enough and I believe that by the blood of Jesus. My love cannot be discriminatory and hateful. That doesn’t fit. My love needs to be wide and deep and embraces especially those society have pushed aside. God help.

Day 35: Kick me when I’m down

January 20, 2019 — Leave a comment

Leviticus 16-18; Psalm 35

After Aaron LOST his sons, God asks him to APOLOGIZE AND ATONE. Let’s be real. At first blush, I’m thinking God is being a real asshole. Who’s with me? This guy just LOST his sons and you want to kick him while he’s down? Have you ever felt that? When you’re down and upset and not sure what the hell went wrong and how you got here.. and then in that moment you’re told You’re wrong and it’s your fault? But… are there times when our sorrow is our fault? Our sorrow is because of our own misbehavior and our own impulsiveness? Does it mean our sorrow doesn’t count? HELL NO! You are sad and you go cry and eat ice cream and have a drink. Be sad. It’s the not being sad that makes you bitter and wallow. But… you might also have been at fault. Maybe your past and your experiences pushed you to be mean or rude or awful? It doesn’t excuse what you did, but it puts it in context. We all exist in context. People act out of emotions that are entrenched from experiences. Those experiences create a deep belief system. So sometimes we may be at fault for a wrongdoing; it doesn’t take away from our worth. Maybe it’s our ego that stops us from owning up. Maybe it’s our ego that stops us from really understanding where we come from, what has made us who we are, what has closed us off and pushed us away from others. Not speaking from experience…

I am one with high walls and I shut down on a dime. And it has hurt many people who love me. I can be cold and short because I’m hurt, but even if I’m hurt, I’m not supposed to hurt those around me. My past experiences of being neglected and emotionally shut down don’t excuse my wrongdoing but it means if I want to address my wrongdoing, I need to re-narrate how I’ve interpreted my experience. It’s a work in progress that requires continual forgiveness, humility and grace.

Day 34: Touch & taste & all the feels

January 19, 2019 — Leave a comment

Leviticus 14-15; Psalm 34

Did you know that if you lost your sense of smell, food wouldn’t taste as food? Why do you hold your breath when you need to take medicine? You don’t taste it as much! All our senses work together to holistically take in the thing at our attention. Do we experience God like that? With our feelings, our body, our thoughts, our purpose, our everything? Can you feel God’s goodness? Can you see it? Does God overtake your senses? How do we allow for that? How can we be open to this kind of depth of encounter?

1. An openness for it. A belief that it is possible to experience God to depths that make you forget yourself.

2. Awareness and sensitivity. If we look and pay attention, all the signs are around us!

3. Letting go and allowing for what good means to evolve. A faith and a benefit of the doubt perception of a God who loves.

Taste and see and feel and hear and hold and embrace and surrender to and smell and grab the goodness of God. It’s big and you have a seat at the table.

Day 33: What goes in must come out

January 18, 2019 — Leave a comment

Leviticus 11-13; Psalm 33

There is nothing wrong with a kid who plays in mud and gets dirty. It’s normal. It happens to all kids who play in mud. It might even be a little cute. Until that muddy kid wants to jump right into your fluffy white comforter. Even the path he takes to get there — the muddy footsteps, the small handprints on the wall, The flinging of mud here and there — you get it, might get dirty. Being unclean isn’t wrong. It only becomes an issue when it comes in contact with something that reveals the uncleanliness by messing with what it comes in contact with, in a negative way. I don’t want a muddy white comforter.

Same with here. There’s nothing wrong with the unclean, unless it messes with the goodness of that around it. What makes us unclean is no longer eating this or that, but how we present ourselves. Do your speech and actions defile the good around you? Do your words negatively impact those who hear it? Does your silence and inaction harm those around you? Does your passionate unswerving speech condemn those around you? It is not what goes in that makes us unclean; it’s what comes out. But sometimes what goes in affects what comes out. If I eat a lot of garlic, my body smells like garlic. If I listen to the same kind of person talk, I might unintentionally quote them or phrase like them. Awareness!

So listen to your rap music, watch your Game of Thrones, read your romance Harlot novels, use your vibrator, eat your chips — I mean it. But if those things affect how you interact with those around you with less care, compassion and love, maybe reconsider? Is there a correlation? No judgment. Just curiosity and awareness that lead to potential change.

Day 32: Boom! You’re on fire.

January 17, 2019 — Leave a comment

Leviticus 8-10; Psalm 32

Aaron and his sons are given an incredible privilege to in God’s presence and showcase his perfection before the people. Honor am I right! Then two of Aaron’s sons, maybe accidentally, maybe just didn’t think too much about it, went before the holy place and were consumed by God’s holiness and died. Aaron is too stricken by grief that he doesn’t say anything and his two other sons have to claim the bodies. Now at this point, if I were an Israelite I would not be jealous of Aaron’s job. Approaching God and being a reflection of God is damn dangerous. It could cost you your life if you don’t do things right. It’s no haphazard, half thought out thing for Aaron and his family to have access to God. It’s no joke that they are chosen to mirror God’s holiness.

One thank you Jesus that our missteps don’t result us in our immediate smiting. But do we sometimes take for granted our access to God? What does it even mean to do that? What does it mean to haphazardly come before God and more importantly try to represent him? Do we get cocky that we have God and start to do what we want thinking whatever God already chose me? How do you balance a freedom to approach God however and a gravitas to the encounter? We have full access to God; I mean God’s in us. Let us not take that lightly and misrepresent how beautiful that is that we have the divine. May we really reflect what it means to be divine, to be chosen as divine. Because that can either draw people towards God or push them away in fear and anger. Poor Aaron. What a lesson to kill his two sons… this Bible can be OUT THERE.

Day 31: Back to one

January 16, 2019 — Leave a comment

Leviticus 5-7; Psalm 31

People were asked to sacrifice from what they had. The rich gave a lamb. The poor could give turtles. These are rituals that demonstrate a deeper meaning. The size of the sacrifice matters less than the willingness to give something of value away to atone. Atonement can be hard to grasp because it assumes we are sinners and we need to be forgiven. What is sin? A propensity to choose ourselves and intentionally/unintentionally wreak havoc in our environment. It doesn’t have to be blatant overt evil. It could be turning a blind eye to those in need. It could be silence in the face of oppression. Sin is the way we break trust with God, each other and even in ourselves. We all do it. What’s the big deal, though? What’s the big deal with a breach of trust here and there? It makes life more veiled and less vulnerable. We work harder to prove our worth. We do things to our benefit and maybe neglect others. Why care about others? We’re interdependent. We are all created in the image of God. We’ve lost that connection to each other, to the earth, to God.

Atonement is to heal this lost and to bring us all back as one. Jesus does that. The Holy Spirit does that. Maybe other things like yoga practices that tell us we are one also do that. But can we simply say we are one without acknowledging the ways we’ve fractured that oneness and answer for it? I acknowledge all the ways I choose myself and selfishly/cowardly not love others fully. How do I shift away from this propensity? How do I choose others and me in all situations? How do I walk with compassion and forgiveness and generosity, without it feeling like an obligation? God help.