Lent Day 44: I give up because I am Loved

April 1, 2021 — Leave a comment

The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail. Your people will rebuild the ancient ruins and will raise up the age-old foundations; you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls, Restorer of Streets with Dwellings. If you keep your feet from breaking the Sabbath and from doing as you please on my holy day, if you call the Sabbath a delight and the Lord’s holy day honorable, and if you honor it by not going your own way and not doing as you please or speaking idle words, then you will find your joy in the Lord, and I will cause you to ride in triumph on the heights of the land and to feast on the inheritance of your father Jacob. For the mouth of the Lord has spoken.

Isaiah 58:11-14

I can give up because I know I will be picked up. I can give up because I know who guides me. I can give up the parts of me that I have put my identity in because I am making room for a better and more exciting purpose. I can give up my grip on the results and outcome because the Word of God promises hope and renewal are the final say. I can give up and fast and give away because God never gives up on me, because I have been given much and because I will always be provided for. I get to give up. I get to give up the small dreams. I get to give up the small outcomes. I get to give up the need to win today because I have already won. I am not alone. I am loved. I am enough.

Lent Day 43: I give up My Reluctance to be Needy

April 1, 2021 — Leave a comment

Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.

Isaiah 58:9

I give up drowning without calling out for help.
I give up holding it together.
I give up keeping it strong.
I give up looking cool.
I give up stuffing it down.
I give up the fear of looking needy.
I give up the fear of looking too sad.
I give up the fear of looking too angry.
I give up the fear of looking too heartbroken.
I give up the fear of being human.
I give up the fear of my wholly moley imperfections.
I give up the fear of my gaping holes that need filling.
I give up my armor.
I cry for help.
Help comes.
This I believe.

Lent Day 42: I give up A Rigid Sense of Self

March 30, 2021 — 1 Comment

Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke? Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter – when you see the naked, to clothe them, and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood? Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard. Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.

Isaiah 58:6-9

I give up a rigid sense of self. Sometimes I have much. Often I am the hungry too. Sometimes I feel rooted at home. Often I am the poor wanderer. Sometimes I feel clothed and beautiful. Often I am naked and even more beautiful. I am in a place of need just as much as I am in a place where I can provide. May I give and receive with the same open heart. May I give and receive with a faith that things can shift and I can ride that. May I give and receive knowing both are needed for our collective healing.

Lent Day 41: I give up Resentment

March 29, 2021 — 1 Comment

If you do away with the yoke of oppression, with the pointing finger and malicious talk, and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed, then your light will rise in the darkness, and your night will become like the noonday. The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail. Your people will rebuild the ancient ruins and will raise up the age-old foundations; Restorer of Streets with Dwellings.

Isaiah 58:9-12

I give up resentment. I give up retaliation. I give up grudges. I give up hurting myself in an attempt to show another person they hurt me. I give into forgiveness. I give into breath. I give into God holding my hands when I can’t seem to keep my head up. I give into God on my side, in me, beside me, before me, behind me. God I pray that you will clear out the bitter and hardened parts of me and replace them with tender and curious openings.

Lent Day 40: I give up My Agenda

March 28, 2021 — 1 Comment

Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke? Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter — when you see the naked, to clothe them, and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood? Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard. Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.

Isaiah 58:6-9

I give up my agenda, in exchange for a divine proposal. I give up my agenda, in exchange for divine appointments. I give up my agenda for God’s timing. I give up my agenda for a life that I alone cannot conjure up or imagine. I give up my agenda of getting even. I give up my agenda of proving myself. I give up my agenda that doesn’t involve God and humanity and the earth. I give up my agenda so I can listen to the voices of my ancestors and hold the generations that will come after me. I give over the procession to God and I anticipate their entrance. Happy Palm Sunday.

Lent Day 39: I give up Passing Over the Unexpected

March 27, 2021 — 1 Comment

Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke? Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter — when you see the naked, to clothe them, and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood? Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard. Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.

Isaiah 58:6-9

I give up feasting on my own so that I can feast with the unexpected. Happy Passover. I give up feasting without knowing the healing power of the table. You are welcomed here. I give up feasting without seeing who around me also needs to be fed. We’re in this together. I give up fasting so that together we can feast oh how far we’ve come, what and who we are made of, and where we are heading. Let’s expect the unexpected with curiosity and love.

Lent Day 38: I give up the Shame around Being Too Much

March 26, 2021 — Leave a comment

Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke? Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter — when you see the naked, to clothe them, and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood? Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard. Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.

Isaiah 58:6-9

I give up the shame around feeling like I’m too much. I do have big wants. I do have big dreams. I have high hopes for our humanity. I imagine heaven is possible. I believe that hope is possible. I believe that healing is possible. My strength lies in my ability to still want so much and believe too much when there exists the high and painful risk of disappointment. I never want to lose that ability to dream and imagine. I want that to be my guide. I want to hold in my heart the possibility of Revelation 21 and the reality of the Garden of Eden. There is beauty. There is hope. There is togetherness. There is a nakedness that is welcomed and loved. I pray that I allow for these things that make me bright and big.

Lent Day 37: I give up Feeling Responsible for it All

March 25, 2021 — Leave a comment

Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I. If you do away with the yoke of oppression, with the pointing finger and malicious talk, and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed, then your light will rise in the darkness, and your night will become like noonday. The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail. Your people will rebuild the ancient ruins and will raise up the age-old foundations; you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls, Restorer of Streets with Dwellings.

Isaiah 58:9-12

I give up Feeling responsible for things I cannot control and things that are not on my plate. I give up the Burdens I have personally laid on my shoulders, that no one wants me to hold up. I give up the Yoke I’ve chained to myself so I can keep my head down and my body heavy. God give me faith to lay it all down at your feet, my fears, my burdens, my desires, my dreams – knowing they are in good hands. I can trust my important and unique place in this world and in my community without walking around like its fate lies on me.

Lent Day 36: I give up Hiding that I want to be Loved

March 24, 2021 — Leave a comment

Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard. Then you will call, and Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.

Isaiah 58:8-9

I give up not admitting, all I want is to be loved. I give up pretending that my biggest desire in the whole while world isn’t to be loved. I give up hiding the truth that I want to be seen, I want to be loved, I want to be wanted. I give up the lie that this need, this want is bad. This need and this want drive me to be most human, most generous, most vulnerable and most available. I want my desire to be loved and my desire to love, love, LOVE to be a fireworks show of care, healing and good ‘ol fun.

Lent Day 35: I give up Closing Up

March 23, 2021 — Leave a comment

Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke? Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter, when you see the naked, to clothe them, and not turn away from your own flesh and blood? Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard. Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.

Isaiah 58:6-9

I give up closing my heart and my hands when I know, and this I do know, in my heart, in my body, in my soul, that when I open my heart and my hands, I will receive in ways I could never have imagined. God, keep my heart and my hands open. God, keep my eyes ready to see you. God, keep my ears ready to hear you. God, please keep me soft and open.